Who gets the friends in the divorce?

On Behalf of | Sep 30, 2021 | Firm News |

Divorce is an upheaval in your situation. While there will be a legal prescription for most of the divisions to come, one thing that will be an ongoing challenge is friendships.

Losing friends to a divorce is a painful situation that you probably can’t avoid, but there are ways to make it less likely, such as:

Ensure your divorce needs are a priority

Divorce can feel like it will consume your every waking hour. You will worry about your children, finances and home throughout. Your worries matter a great deal, and you should make sure your attorney advocates for your needs in the divorce. Work out your goals with your attorney and be extremely clear about what you want. That way, you can relax.

Create a space for you to grow

While your attorney pursues your goals, you can work on yourself. You can follow new interests. You can do things that would have been too difficult to convince your ex to do. You have the opportunity to grow now, and that might lead to new friends and new life. Be open to it.

Don’t make every conversation about your divorce.

If you meet with friends, either “couple friends” or friends you had before your marriage, you will want to talk with them about your divorce. They will be there to listen to you, and you should take advantage of that, but friendship is a two-way street. You should be open to their issues. Showing you care about your friends will go a long way to keeping them in your life.

Understand that all relationships change

A friendship you cherished while you were married may not ever be the same once you’ve divorced. That’s a simple fact and it can be hard to accept. However, just because the relationship has changed doesn’t mean it’s gone.

How you approach your divorce will dictate so much of what comes later, but you don’t have to worry that you’ll lose all the people that matter to you.